Only trying to be helpful

Having been away in Devon surfing (yes proof will follow for those who disbelieve) I took the opportunity to catch up on local news from Brighton by reading my piled up copies of the Argus.

I am not one of those who delight in knocking the local rag. The reporters do a good job with limited resources, and it would be greatly missed if it were ever to close.

Distance does allow reflection though, and the letters page can be really depressing.

I do recall an old Argus editor (no name I'm afraid) telling me once at a social event that 'only nutcases write to local newspapers.' I laughed hesitantly, and declined to tell him that I had actually written a brilliantly prescient and well-argued letter only 2 weeks previously.

It seems to me that now however only political activists, councillors and budding candidates appear on the letters page.

Having looked at many of the recent missives I thought I could help my previous colleagues by producing a template for them to use when writing to the editor. This way they could save themselves time and send even more in. There is no copyright and it's available to all the Parties-

Dear Editor

The (insert subject of latest local controversy) is all the fault of the  Conservative Government/the previous coalition Government/ the last Labour Government/ the Green Council/ the Labour Council (delete as appropriate).
The facts (at this point it is useful to insert an irrelevant statistic*) clearly show that (delete as appropriate) the Conservatives/Labour/Greens/(if UKIP)the EU are to blame.

We intend to bicker snipe complain sneer campaign about this Conservative/Labour/Green (delete as appropriate) debacle without offering any practical alternative ourselves.

Yours sincerely

Insert name

(Delete as Appropriate) Conservative/Labour/Green Spokesperson on (insert subject of squabble)

*thank you to Shaun Gunner for this useful additional tip.